"Leave the door open".

Walking, running and flying?

The mist appeared as the fog cleared. 

It was a particularly monsoon-y day, but it wasn’t raining. 

Blots of grey clouds were splattered all across the sky, their heaviness had weighed them down to touch the Earth’s atmosphere and glide along its dimensions. 

I was walking on a road, I don’t really know which one and to where. 

But I was simply walking, probably hoping that it’ll lead me to someplace? I just knew that it had been quite a long time, my feet were hurting. 

How did I get here? 

I couldn’t see anything in front of me, just the mist. The droplets of water suspended in the air had soaked my clothes and my otherwise frizzy hair were plastered to my forehead. 

But I kept walking. 

Then suddenly, in a flash of a second, as if entering a portal to a whole different world, I walked out of the mist…

and now, before my eyes, lay fields of crops on both sides of the road, accompanied by numerous tiny huts made of straw and mud. 

It seemed like a remote village. 

Why is it so quiet though? Are there any people living here…?

I couldn’t see a soul in sight. 

I turned back, the mist was still there, thick and swirling. I couldn’t see anything behind it, only the dense whiteness. 

I turned in front, and saw only endless rows of fields and huts as far as my vision could reach. 

This is strange…

It was extremely quiet, not even the swooshing of the wind could be heard, or even the soft ruffle of leaves. All I could hear was my own uneven breathing and hesitant footsteps. 

The silence was loud. It filled the air. It enveloped my being. 

But not in an eerie way, just that it was the only thing that I was noticing since there wasn’t anything else grabbing my attention, yet. 

I continued to walk slowly into the village and took in my new surroundings. 

The road was made of concrete and it cut abruptly to the sides, with mud and stone paths leading off to the many rows of crops — corn, wheat, sugarcane and the like. The fields were all of the exact same size. (How could I know this? Well, I don’t know, I just did.) 

Each field had a tiny hut adjacent to it. All of their front doors were latched shut. 

The environment was cold. 

As I was looking around and walking, now at a faster pace, my eyes randomly drifted off towards the left and rested upon one of those huts. 

I continued gazing at it point blank and came to a stop. 

Something inside me started stirring. Curiosity? Probably. But I felt like that one hut in particular was beckoning me to come towards it. Something about it was inviting me in, it was calling out to me. I just didn’t know what. 

Does that matter? 

I decided to go in its direction. 

As I stood in front of the latched door, I debated whether I should turn back or knock. 

Doesn’t matter. 

I knocked. 

*thump thump* 

The latch turned on its own and, with a creak, the door opened a crack. 

I pushed it with my palm, entered inside, and…

I saw…

I saw that…

I saw that my grandfather, my late grandfather, my Ajoba who had passed away 15 years ago, was sitting there on a dark-brown coloured couch. 

No way, I’m seeing stuff… this is obviously not true. Right? A mirage? A sense of security in this surreal and unknown place?

It could be a mirage. I had been walking endlessly for devil knows how long, and I didn’t have a clue about where I was headed and how I even got here.

My Ajoba was staring straight ahead, vacantly into empty space. I was standing to his right side. He wasn’t even blinking. Just sitting there with his hands on his lap. 

I am going mad…

My eyes started filling with tears. And in a span of a few seconds, it was a stream. 

I’ve missed you so much…

I was shaking uncontrollably, trying to choke back my tears, but they were too strong, it was too overwhelming, I couldn’t do it. 

They burst out the door of my eyelids. 

I never got a chance to properly tell you I love you… am I getting one now? 

I let it all flow. I let it all out. I ran towards my grandfather, clutched tightly onto his arm and cried loudly like a little girl while burying my face in his shoulder. 

I couldn’t speak. My thoughts were all over the place. 

I’m losing it… I am such a fucking baby, crying like this… I miss you, Ajoba… please come back… please? 

He didn’t say anything, and we just sat like that for a while. 

Then, with his huge hands, I felt him patting my head. I imagined myself as a kitten. 

A relief I hadn’t experienced in a long time suddenly washed over me in waves just by that one gesture. 

His wrinkly but sturdy hands felt like a cover of protection. 

He continued the head patting, but didn’t utter a word. Regardless, his presence alone calmed me down. 

I always thought that if Ajoba were here to see me today, he’d be disappointed in the woman I’ve become. 

Sensitive. Shy. Weak. Dumb. Ugly. 

These words screamed inside my head.

But when I finally looked up to face him, I saw the beam of the proudest smile in the whole wide world. 

The shitty cacophony of those shitty thoughts died down in an instant. 

All he radiated was the purest, most genuine energy full of love. Almost like he was channelling it only for me. 

I wasn’t clutching his arm tightly anymore. And my tears had left dried, salty patches on my cheeks. 

Slowly, I let go. 

I let go of his hand. 

I decided to continue on my journey, to wherever it may be. I knew I could face whatever came in my path now. Just like that, I knew it. I believed it. I believed my Ajoba. I knew in my heart that he felt so. And if he did, it was true for me too. 

I believed that I had that strength.

I gave him a hug and strode to walk out into the world again. 

“Arya”, Ajoba called out in a soft voice. 

I immediately glanced back to look at him, I wasn’t surprised that he had finally spoken.

“Yes?”, I asked. 

“Leave the door open”. 

I smiled at him, and ran out the door into the fields. 

The sun was shining up in the sky.

And it was basking everything in its warm, golden light. 

I ran and ran and ran…

It was time to take flight. 

__ 

P.S. Like what you read? 

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P.P.S I have a blog now. And it’s super wacky and kawaii, if I may say so myself. 

Check it out here, and lemme know what you think?